When was the last time you felt truly grateful to be alive? I’ve had a few of those, but that’s not what this story is about…it’s about the time-the one and only- I was astonished to be alive.
Last year, walking up the hill to uni, when I remembered a dream.
Somebody was out to kill me…and that’s pretty normal, as dreams go…and they were shooting at me with a machine gun…I was trying to shield my body, my head with my arms, even though I knew it was useless. All I could look at was that barrel, and know my body was quietly becoming red mush. Red mush in a white room, where the only window are behind me, alight with mid-afternoon sun.
Then I woke up. And I thought dying had been a dream. I debated it over in my head, and eventually settled on it being reality- I had, after all, just woken into a very sensible-looking world. And while I debated, I was looking at the trees around Aro Valley/Adams Terrace, so green, so vibrant, so real.
I regretted not having enjoyed life more. And then I realised that I had been, indeed, living life moment by moment, enjoying the little things. So that regret ran away.
And there were these people-around 3 of them-I remember them as vague grey figures, but they were people-they were familiar to me. We talked. They got me used to the idea of being dead.
And I remembered this dream while walking up the same slope on which I had been standing during it. What a shock! Like my eyes had been opened. I was alive, when I had been dead! How often does that happen?
Strangest walk to uni ever 😛